Integrity & Agreements for Circles of Sacred Space

In the circle, we are all equal. There is now one in front of you & nobody behind you. No one is above you; no one is below you. The circle is sacred because it is designed to create unity.
— Lakota wisdom

I choose to be the kind of leader I want to be led by. I want to be lead by someone with the heart and behavior of a guide. Someone to be there WITH me as support with more understanding than I have. Someone who will not hand me every fucking thing to survive. Someone who can tend the fire of camp while I walk-about and find my own way. Someone who believes in my thrive-al and challenges me to move there. I lead by guidance. I try to lead by example, and sometimes I do...and sometimes I mess up...and it's all perfectly wild.

I want my circles to be a place for women to have time, space, and guidance for self-discovery and speaking with sacred voice. This is not a space of "this is how you should live and this is how you should deal with things." This is a sacred space for you to figure out how to feel, know, and express your truth as it resides in who you are. This is a place and time to learn how to be who you are and discover what that feels like. This is a place to be supported as you own and process what you learn about who you are. This is a place to figure out your light, your dark, and how these realms within you form a whole and work together. This is a place to fall in love with all of who you are. This is a place to discover what your wholeness is...on your terms...without judgement. This is place to listen to your inner voice and become your own guide.

When it gets right down to it, the basic premise is respect each other. No one is the same and I have a fierce mandate to every being has a right to their truth, and a right to protect themselves.

You pay me the big bucks! Naw, seriously though...the way I see it, I would add something to the above quote. A circle is a circle because of a line...and edge...a boundary...that, by its very nature establishes space. The line that gives a circle expression and shape is what makes it a container & the guardian of what is inside it, and around it. With a circle, there are no corners to get stuck in or be blinded produces a fluid, spiral movement...which allows the leader to also participate. I see it as its only structure is the line...the boundary...the edge. Its only structure is that which makes is protected, whole, equal, and balanced. Someone must be responsible for the health, wealth, and safe-keeping of a circle's energy. I see those who hold circles of sacred space as these guardians...the lines that define...create...and contain the circle for safe-keeping. I have much more practical & sassy thoughts on this subject, but the bottom line is we all have our flaws and our strengths. Who you look up to and want to be led by have broken bits too. I want to be held by the people I hold and that is easier said than done...but I try...every. damn. time. So, pay your space holders...we aren't better than you; we are taking on the extra responsibility for the space while we sit in it, too.

Circles. And when we circle together I take a turn in the space to share too. I've seen women in my circles feel empowered in their healing abilities by having to hold me right after I've held them. See? Circles. Yummy. And I still have to hold the space while I'm participating. It's work!

I lead & guide what I know...and keep an open space for that knowing to grow. I lead & guide so you can unearth and cultivate your own empowerment...your own medicine...and your own way. I'll answer anything you ask...but I won't shove my way down your throat. Use what I share to build your own foundation and personal empire. I want to see you THRIVE


Triggers & reflections

Soul soil excavating can feel raw and scary. When we all SHOW UP in sacred space, vulnerability is in the air. And you often find a triggered part of yourself in others. Triggers are bound to happen and we can't really control when, but we can control how we shoot back. I encourage the practice of following a trigger to it's place of origin within you and noticing who or what is actually pulling that trigger. Self knowing is empowerment. You are the only thing you can change and have power over. Be mindful of the difference between fear and discomfort. Know the difference in your body. Reflect before react.


Honoring diversity

You don't have to agree with someone to understand or support them in their personal process. In this, we can respectfully listen to them when we are coming from a place that everyone has a right to their truth, their beliefs, and their story. I often remind myself that I want that same respect, therefore I must give it. This agreement points us in the direction of support...non-judgment...discernment...compassion and impeccable good boundaries. There is so much to learn about Life when we sit with open curiosity to what is new or foreign to us. 


sacred listening

There is something magically healing when we are heard and seen without being held to it. Just held in it. When we listen with our sacred ears we are listening to understand...know...and feel. We are listening to connect, and understand, not respond. This agreement opens the multiple channels of hearing that we have access to. It shows us more than what the words are saying. It makes us see-feel the ways we are connected instead of the ways we aren't. Everyone wants to be heard. Not everyone hears. Learn to listen by doing the practice of sacred listening.


Know your sacred language

Being a space of sacred individualism...circles with me rely on the notion that each one of us knows our own language of sacred. It can feel like having to translate a foreign language. For example: there are many ways to express the many paths to the sacred. Prayer, ask the universe, visualize, cast a spell, meditate, journey, etc. All are words of digging inside oneself to receive support from the intangibles of Life. When you hear a word that isn't your word, but you understand the notion...translate it to yourself if needed. This is both honoring you & the other. Knowing our own language takes us to the fields beyond "right" & "wrong" where we can all breath easier....together.

These are the key mandates for a circling with me. Of course it leaves a lot open for either interpretation and change. Which is how I also hold my circles of sacred space. I believe that flexible structure gives freedom to being in the moment. If, for some reason, you are having difficulty remaining in integrity, please ask for help with as much care as you can muster. 

See you in circle!

Love, Nissa