In my neck of the woods, we have a wild & native flower called Trillium. I remember the first time I saw one. I was 19. Hiking with a guy-friend. We were chatting away when the corner of my eye caught a flash of white from the ground. My body reacted with an automatic impulse...turning me and dropping me to the ground as if I were laying myself at the feet of a beloved deity. My friend giggled at the immediate turn of focus and admitted to the shock he received when my unexpected squeal filled the air. Fortunately, my friend grew up here in Western Oregon and identified it when I looked up at him and breathlessly asked "what IS this flower?". I can still see the amusement in his smile. He always appreciated my whimsical and unconventional ways. I sat in front of that white three-pedaled beauty for what seemed like hours. I remember the conversation we had through the language of feelings & sensations...her resounding message at the time was "remember who you are".
Not-so-coincidentally this was the year I sat in my first women's circle, began reading any & all things new-age, witchcraft, druidic, moon, and women mysteries. This was the year I found the meaning behind maiden, mother, crone...and found that I actually had the mind power to heal myself and create my own reality. I was ravenous for knowing but stuffed myself with knowledge instead. Knowledge that served the path of knowing, but by no means secured my knowing. I truly believe each one of us has all we need inside to be whole...we just have to make the choice to explore and alchemize.
I learned how sacred, medicinal, and magical Trillium is. I learned how they grow, what they need to reproduce, and how to tincture them. Most facts I wouldn't be able to regurgitate to you now these 21 years later. I do, however, have my knowing of them from the connections and conversations I had with Trillium over the years. I do have the knowing of my experiences with them that have never left me. One of the tid-bits I have carried with me is that Trilliums bloom every seven years. 7 is a particularly spiritual number and has correspondences all over the various cosmologies. (7 body chakras anyone?) I Oracle this shit to mean that every Trillium I see is not afraid of the dark. They thrive on being below the surface and living in a way that tends to the depths and roots of their being. They remind me that not everyone is cut out for constant blooming or yearly surface breaking. They remind me that some medicine takes years of underground dwelling to be what it is designed to be. Another juicy bite I carry with me is how they sensitively tend to unbalanced menstrual cycles by aiding the blood to begin. I'm astounded at the message of how something as powerful as blood requires a tender touch.
Every year, when I encounter my first Trillium of the year, I offer it a gift and some gratitude and spend some time listening to it...remembering who I am...and relearning what I know to be medicine from the lens of who I am now. It has become my Trillium tradition to sit with the first one I see and reflect on the last 7 years...and the 7 years before that, and so on. 7 years ago was a tragic year for my daughter that began a dark depressive season in her life. 7 years ago I began to see the trappings of spiritual enlightenment when the human element isn't allowed to be sacred. #samedogmadifferent"church" And I began to behave in ways that were true to me...only to get me in trouble with those people in spiritual power. 7 years ago I was able-minded to do ALL the things effortlessly and shined with a vitality that I didn't have to fight daily for. 7 years ago I was only having mild headaches...it was a glorious calm before the storm in my head that placed me on an unknown land within myself. 7 years ago I was a very different person. 14 years ago I was engaged. Planning a destination wedding with no-one but us. I was in a high paying job with stress levels that suffocated me. 14 years ago, I had full fight in me. Damn I was powerful...and naive...and adorably hopeful. 21 years ago I was 19...beginning my path of sacred exploration. I was larger than life with endless energy that drove me to self-sufficent tendencies and treasured adventures. 21 years ago I was angry all the time...anger is potent fuel for action. I was a playa who crushed a lot, with careless choices and grand memories. Whew...I'm kinda tired from just remembering all the energetic power I had back then.
Every year this Trillium Tradition reminds me of how my Life is made up of many, many selves within the whole Self of who I am. I am both no longer these past parts of me AND very much these parts of me. They still have a say in my resistances and fears. They still need some understanding and forgiveness. They still have a say in the wholeness of who I am, therefore, need to be heard in order to not take over. They need called out on occasion to see my story of now and feel a part of who I am becoming so they are less likely to sabotage it. Tricky lil' wee beasties.
Last week my Trillium Tradition happened for this year. Perfect timing in conjunction with all the thoughts, feelings, and creatings I'm in for my Circle offering. Remembering how 7 years ago began the second spiritual rebellion of my life that propelled me through the underworld of where I am today...offering a sacred space for women to rewild themselves to wholeness and declare their right & responsibity to their Life. Grateful, I am, for that second rebellion...it gave me the courage to burn all my certificates and give myself permission to unbrand myself with anything that isn't me and put me on the edge of finding out how to be okay just as I am...warts and all.
If you have Trillium in your neck of the woods, I offer you the invitation to try my lil' tradition. If you don't have them around and still want to play, go for it! Use the pictures for observing. Meditate, journey, or astral project yourself to the energy of Trillium and revisit your 7 year cycles.
And if you are looking for a sacred space to tend to the who you are, doing what is true, and shifting the shit that isn't of your power...consider the Circle I'm offering. The doors are open right now and will be closing next week. The welcoming preparations are active as soon as you enroll to the Ruzuku room.
Feel inspired to act on my Trillium Tradition? I'd love to hear about it in the comments below.