I broke up with new years resolutions YEARS ago because I realized the failure and self disappointment I felt when they fell short was not worth feeling. At the end of 2012, I saw on the Facebook world women announcing their word for the upcoming 2013 year. So I stalked their posts and clicked on the free downloads to guide one to their word of the year. I found it to be kinda-crazy-awesome. I loved the idea of working with one word for a whole year. To have a simple focus on it. To have a complex understanding of it through experience and life.
2013...my word was opportunity. And the ripples of experience met with holding myself present in order to bring in the focus of opportunity. I found all the heavy challenges thrown my way as opportunities, therefore I responded to them more positively. I found the awesome moment more vibrant and magical, therefore I allowed myself to feel the joy and fun more. It was a roller coaster year that I look back on as incredible learning and wisdom and self exploration. Looking back at 2013, I feel connected to opportunity and realize I created a relationship to it, and I let it change me. A-ha! I finally feel an accomplished and successful resolution played out in my life. I had to simplify my focus to amplify my results.
Simple doesn't mean easy.
And I value the lessons of my opportunities because this is true for me. Building a relationship to opportunity in a simple way brought me to the complexities of understanding deeply what opportunity is. For me, it became a work out for my "space holding" muscles. It became a wide open field for me to run free in. It became a nurturing cave to lick my wounds and begin again. Gratitude doesn't even scratch the surface.
Entering 2014, finding my word was much like being in a labyrinth. Searching in one direction, following the scent and BAM, a wall....nope, this isn't the one. But I kept following the scent. I had to dig deep and I found myself surrounded by the truth of a word that scares the shit out of me a bit. This word takes me to deeply disappointed places where judgements, criticisms, and abandonment have very loud voices. Stepping into the home of this word and these voices will require me to allow myself to be emotional, vulnerable, and warrior....terrifying; a battle for more. It incites anxiety and excitement and child like open-hearted-ness. It will require me to own it, take credit, and give. And this word is....
This month of getting to know my word I have been on the "first date" high. We giggle and play and flirt. And I have been giving it full attention, which is why I haven't blogged in over a month. I am already creating. I am looking forward every day while staying present...in the moment...performing the tasks of creating. Held by constant flow of inspiration and dreams. Held in the accomplishments of: book content, art-work for divination cards, loving moments with my family, and forgiveness for the judgey critics. Feels good.
Do you have a word for the year? Share it here! Do you want one? Below are the links I used to guide me through discovering mine.